Taming of the Hippie
by HaleighWinchester
Summary: Taming of the Shrew and Game of Thrones crossover. Set in 1960's hippie commune. In format of a play because this was a school project. Kathy Moon Flower (Kathleen) is having a totally not groovy evening because her bummer husband Patrick Earth Spirit (Patruccio) is a drag. Their camp explodes and Kathy meets an unlikey visiter of their world. It's Jon Snow. Super great must read.


Kathy Moon Flower returned from the Grateful Dead concert to her dude's tent at the commune. They got hitched after she owed him all that bread for the grass she bought. She couldn't pay him back because she lost all her cash (and clothes) at Woodstock. She was mashing up grapes for their commune's wine when she started to come down from her high and realized that what she was doing was a total bummer. As she came to this realization, her husband, Patrick Earth Spirit, walked in.

Patrick Earth Spirit: "Sister Flower Moon! You know where my pipe is?"

Kathy Moon Flower: "This is a total drag. This place sucks brotha."

Patrick Earth Spirit: "Woahhh Flower... I'm really not digging your energy babe."

Kathy Moon Flower: "We haven't showered in four months."

Patrick Earth Spirit: "We have the spirit of the earth... bathing's for the capitalist warloards Kathy."

Kathy Moon Flower: "All I do is work and get high but you only get high"

Patrick Earth Spirit: "You know what, Kathy? I was about to lead this totally groovy spirit session with that totally chill new guy Charlie Manson, but you've totally infected my vibes. I guess I have to go tell the commune that today's trip to transcendance was ruined AGAIN by Kathy Moo-"

Just then the happily married couple heard a massive explosion from outside of the tent. They were not injured, but the shockwave shredded their tent away (I'm not a scientist) and they were left sitting on their tent's blanket in the open field of their commune. They gazed upon origin of the shockwave to see a massive crater off in the distance, dead and injured hippies scattered about it. Assuming their sudden experience and surroundings were the result of the lingering LSD in their system, they were calm and unruffled of this calamity, and decided to check out the totally groovy hole in the ground.

They approached the crater, stepping over dead hippie bodies and camp debris, and saw a man standing in the middle dressed in strange heavy black clothes with a fluffy black cloak. He had a sword on his belt and had dark curly hair that hung on the sides of his face. He had fair skin and a wore concerned expression upon his brow. He looked around at the few hippies that were still alive surrounding the perimeter of the crater. He scanned all of their faces as if he was searching for someone. His expression grew more anxious the more he skimmed through the blank faces. He looked as though he was about to lose hope when his eyes landed on those of Kathy Moon Flower's. She felt her heart skip a beat as she made eye contact with the mysterious man. She turned to her husband to check if he was seeing the same trippy shit she was witnessing, but he was no longer by her side, as he was scanning the dead bodies for bread and grass. She turned back to the strange man to see that he was now sprinting toward her. In Kathy's acid trips, when people run toward her they ususally turn into a dragon, so she was preparing herself to retreat when the stranger stopped her.

Stranger: "Don't flee, flower haired woman! I mean you no harm. My name is Jon Snow."

Kathy Moon Flower: "Groovy spirit name brotha."

Jon Snow: "I have been sent from The Wall to this primitive land to bring you to Westeros. You are the reincarnation of Daenerys, mother of dragons. You must come to Westeros to claim your land. Your rightful place as the queen. Your seat on the Iron Throne. You are a Targaryan. Kathleen Stormborn. Mother of Dragons."

Kathy Moon Flower: "Oh shit... dragons... groovy, man. So, The Wall... Pink Floyd?"

Jon Snow: "You must come with me to Westeros. Your people need you."

Kathy looked back at her husband who was still raiding the dead hippie bodies.

Kathy Moon Flower: "Sure, brotha."

Kathy Moon Flower went back to Westeros with Jon Snow through a new portal that exploded and killed even more hippies. They saved Westeros and lived happily ever after for about five weeks until the White Walkers came and killed everybody.


End file.
